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Writing an Ad (Your Opinion Please)

October 11th, 2010 at 12:53 pm

On (very) rare occasion, I pay for advertising for http://www.etsy.com/shop/prettycheap. My frugal artisan tendencies include frugal small business practices which point toward using no-cost promotions to the fullest extent.

This coming December I will be a seller at a popular local event. The community ice rink holds a Fri/Sat/Sun figure skate show to kick off holiday and seasonal festivities. It is a real treat, a well kept secret. Those who have attended are floored by the fantastic costumes, lights, decorations and all around production. The young kids do skate numbers, but it's the skate school instructors who steal the spotlight.

Most of these instructors are US Figure Skating competitors, on regional and national levels. As you know, it's a competitive world we spectators can only imagine. Therefore, just qualifying for USFS events is huge. These adults though are medalists.

Their performances at our Winter Ice Show is like going to the Olympic figure skate competition. Maybe not the finalists, but certainly like seeing the bronze and nearby runners up.

You can hear them breathe hard as they WHOOSH past the glass 3 feet from your grandstand seat. I love it.

OK, so these shows sell out. The rink is smart and holds a little marketplace in the area near the entrance, inside near the snack bar, etc. The sellers pay a fee to participate plus gives a small percent of sales to their fundraising. I will have a booth for the 2nd year in the rink area near the snack bar.

As you can tell I am already a supporter of the event. Well, there is an opportunity to place a little 'ad' in the program. The cost is $30 for a biz card size.

I want to take advantage of this low cost, and likely highly effective opportunity. We have a VERY captive audience of several hundred over the 4 show weekend.

A colleague who participates at this event next to me (we set up together to double the size of our booth) will go in half on the ad.

SO - Here is my ad copy. Will you give comments?

*** What are the weak points?
*** What are the strong points?
*** The key offer is to get the $5 off by making a purchase of $25 total from just one of us. Is that clear? How can it be made more clear (without muddling up the copy more)?]

*sigh* if the picture is not visible above, click http://www.flickr.com/photos/prettycheap/5072350147/

2 Responses to “Writing an Ad (Your Opinion Please)”

  1. momcents Says:

    I think it looks great. I might say "any" purchase, rather than "your" purchase. That might clear up any ambiguity.

    And you do realize that you will be freezing in the ice arena, right? My girls have competed (Irish Dance) at the Petitt Ice Arena in Milwaukee, WI where they also train for the Olympics. The second time around we were prepared with fleece and hoodies (in July, might I add).

    Good luck with the sale!

  2. dmontngrey Says:

    $5 off a sale from you OR her? No, that's not clear to me in the ad. It does need to clearly specify one booth or the other if that's your intention. Is it possible to agree to split the discount? I think folks would be more likely to use the coupon if they weren't tied down to one or the other. Especially where you're displaying your items and advertising together, this has the potential to get quite confusing with the "either/or" discount. $5 off a combination of items might entice me to buy if I was on the fence about either "booth".

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