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Home > College Graduate? Let me translate...

College Graduate? Let me translate...

September 11th, 2008 at 09:07 am

Sent by courtesy of my brother the psychologist. Have a good chuckle.

The following list of phrases and their definitions might help us better understand the language used in reporting results from clinical and pre-clinical research.

"It has long been known"... I didn't look up the original reference.

"Three of the samples were chosen for detailed study"... The other results didn't make any sense.

"Typical results are shown"... This is the prettiest graph.

"In my experience"... once

"In case after case"... twice

"In a series of cases"... three times

"It is believed that"... I think.

"It is generally believed that"... A couple of others think so, too.

"Correct within an order of magnitude"... Wrong.

"According to statistical analysis"... Rumour has it.

"A statistically oriented projection of the significance of these findings"... A wild guess

"It is clear that much additional work will be required before a complete understanding of this phenomenon occurs"... I don't understand it.

"After additional study by my colleagues"... They don't understand it either.

"Thanks are due to Joe Blotz for assistance with the experiment and to Cindy Adams for valuable discussions"... Mr. Blotz did the work and Ms. Adams explained to me what it meant.

"It is hoped that this study will stimulate further investigation in this field"... I quit.
[And I always thought this meant, "We'll be seeking additional funding soon.]

2 Responses to “College Graduate? Let me translate...”

  1. Broken Arrow Says:

    Hilarious! I recall (may have overheard) reading (sleeping on) something like this (Sunday comics) a while back (have no idea when), so thanks for posting again!

  2. gamecock43 Says:


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